Chaelaisms

Here are some of our latest adventures with Chaela and some of the things she likes to say.

I'm Buzz Ahya!  Infiny an beyon! ("I'm Buzz Lightyear!  To infinity and beyond!" usually said when daddy is "flying" her around.)

No, mommy, go-way.  ("I think I'm an adult, and I'm a bossy one.")

I put it riiiiiiiiiiiight dere.

Kampa!  Make a tent! ("Grandpa, put your head under this blanket this instant!")

NO, Pat!  No sit on DAT! (Random quote she says a lot from Hop on Pop)

When-niw mine refre-sha-sho whoma see insaaaaaaa!  (Singing, "When will my reflection show who I see inside?"  Then repeat, but screamed instead of sung.)

Anoise, noise, Noise, NOISE!! (From The Grinch, "Oh the noise, noise..." etc.  Especially pleasant when shouted in the car for 5-10 minutes without stopping.)

Chaela: Woody... a GIRL!
Me: No, honey, Woody is a boy.
Chaela: NO!  Woody.... a GIRL! (She's learning about girls and boys.)

Baby sit on meen potty! ("I'm telling you I want to sit on my potty because I know you'll run to the bathroom, and then I won't use the potty but instead climb on my stool and demand to wash my hands for the eighth time today, because that's my sneaky way of getting to play in the water since you refuse to let me frolic in Gretel's water dish.")  (She calls herself "baby," which we're working on, "meen" is her word for "my/mine.")


First story:

On Wednesday I made the mistake of leaving the TV remote on the table where Chaela could reach it.  We put stuff like that up, because if we don't, Chaela takes it and drops it in one of several little magpie-like caches.  Anyway, I came down later that night and it was gone.  Will and I spent a half an hour looking for it.  We asked Chaela if she knew where it was, and she pretended not to know what we were talking about.
Finally, after a half an hour of searching, I sat Chaela down right in front of me, looked her in the eye, and said, "Honey, you won't be in trouble, you can tell mommy.  Did you play with the remote earlier today?"
She eyeballed me for a minute, then said, "Yeah..."
"Ok," I replied," do you know where you left it?"
She spun around like a top, pointed dramatically at a long, skinny table with a drawer in it, and yelled (in apparent shock,  "Oh!  Dere it is!"
She jumped off my lap, ran over, and pulled open the drawer in the table (which was good, because I thought she was pointing to a box under it) and yelled, "YOOK!  Right DERE!"  Sure enough, there it was.

Story two:

About fifteen minutes ago, Will sent Chaela upstairs with a dirty diaper.  I laid her down so I could change her, and all of the sudden she lifted up her shirt and pointed to her belly button.
"Yook, mommy, yook!  Baby color dat!"
I was focused on the diaper, so I just nodded and said, distractedly, "Mm-hm, good job, honey!"
As I was getting ready to stand up and throw away the diaper, I noticed several streaks of yellow marker on her arm.
"Baby color dat, mommy," she told me, showing me her arm.  Then she lifted her shirt again.  This time, I looked at her belly button.  "Yook, mommy, baby color dat, too!"
Yup.  Chaela colored her belly button yellow.

Life will have much less humor in it when I no longer have a toddler.  That's why I'm having another one.

A Review of the YA Fantasy Genre

I've been reading quite a bit of the YA (young adult) fantasy genre lately, and I have to say, overall I'm disappointed.

Not about everything.  I've turned to YA in recent months because my lifelong go-to genre, adult sci-fi/fantasy, has left me crying out for the tiniest breath of original thought.  YA, I feel, has some of the best, most original stories out there right now.  They're also usually more fun and funny than their adult counterparts, which take themselves much too seriously, especially considering their subject matter.

Amazingly creative as some of the stories are, there are a few basics that many authors in genre just kind of skip when it suits them.

This is the story that doesn't end.
With the exception of snobby literature, where ending a story without actually ending it is "edgy" or "art," no novel should be over before it really does end.  You can't just leave entire huge plotlines unfinished; that makes readers unhappy.  I'm not saying summarize the rest of the characters' lives, I'm saying, if the whole book is about two characters getting married to end a war, and then you end the book with the characters confessing their love for each other and just stop writing without mention of the war at all, that's bad.

"I can't explain it!"
This has been a huge problem in many YA fantasy books I've read.  We're going along fine, liking the book pretty well, when all of the sudden an event happens that's not explainable even by the magic in the book. 
For example, in one book I read this week, a girl falls from hundreds of feet in the air while flying over a battle taking place on a mountaintop, then wakes up in her bed. She even wonders to herself how it happens, then says, "To this day, I can't explain it."  
Excuse me?  You, the writer, the supreme being in this universe, can't come up with something?  To me that says, "I am either too lazy or not talented enough to come up with a plausible explanation, so this is what you get."  Not good enough, my friend.  Not good enough.

Race to the finish.
A suitable climax wraps up all of the big stuff, the guy gets the girl, the spell is broken, etc., etc.  At this time, a good writer will wind down and take the time to give you a really great ending, because as we learned in high school, while the climax usually happens towards the end, it is not actually the end.  The climax usually has aftermath that needs to be dealt with.  Who lived after that large battle?  Who died?  What direction are things going in now, i. e., happily ever after (stand-alone book) or not as great as we had hoped (sequel coming soon)? These are the questions that are usually answered post-climax; this is the time to show the reader how things actually stand.  A lot of YA books, having gotten us through the climax, feel like that's enough.  I may be alone here, but I just don't feel like it is.

"I hate you with a passion that burns, as I have for 200 pages!  No!  Come back!  The book is ending and I just decided exactly right now that I love you!  Let's get married!"
 That pretty much sums that one up.  The worst part is that this happens in almost every single YA book I read.  Every.  Single.  One. 
Granted, it's not always like that.  Sometimes they randomly decide to be in love at the beginning or middle of the story. But for it to feel real, a relationship like this needs time to develop, unless you can explain it with some kind of instantaneous, magical bonding, which some stories do.  (A sudden attack of endless love is something I'm working on with my own story right now.  As it stands, things are too rushed.)

On an unrelated note, my two year old is walking around saying, "Simmer down, man!"  Maybe that's what I need to do.

Getting Closer

I just realized that I have a little less than two months (seven-ish weeks) left until Joci is due.  I'm pretty happy about it, and insanely jealous of my friend who had her baby on Wednesday.  Well, maybe not insanely. 

This may sound weird, but when I was pregnant with Chaela I felt like pregnancy was forever and I'd never actually give birth to the child I was carrying.  Now that I've had one, though, I know that the end does come.  Besides, it's harder to focus so much on being pregnant when you've got a toddler who screams for attention every second she's awake (literally).

I'm ok with waiting for now, because I'm paranoid when it comes to newborns.  But the date is slowly sneaking up on me.  I just hope the snow here is melted by April.  I'm sick of it!!

Forever Young (Looking)

Readers, it's been a while since I've had any interesting stories to tell you about the students I sub for. Here's a new one.

On Thursday night I was called to sub for a math teacher at Ridgeview Jr. High. Over a decade ago, it was just "the junior high," and I went there. It was in that very building that I truly began to understand what living in Pickerington meant (short version: We Think We're Better Than You). Some things will never change.

Anyway, I was called to do a half-day, just four periods in the afternoon. Only three of those classes were classes, the other one, seventh period, was a lunch duty.

All of the classes were easy. I get the feeling the teacher is generally very strict (the best kind to sub for). In the 6th period class, one of those, "Look at me!!! I think I'm funny but actually I'm obnoxious!" kids asked me if I'd like to go dancing this weekend. I told him I was married.

But the story I really want to tell happened seventh period when I had lunch duty. The other teachers had me sit at a table and be in charge of passes, something even a sub isn't too likely to mess up. The same table had two students, a girl and a boy, sitting at it selling candy for something. The boy came and sat by me.

Boy: Hi.
Me: Hi.
Boy: Aren't you going to eat lunch? *munches on ridiculous amounts of tater tots*
Me: No. I ate before I got here.
Boy: Right, right.
Silence.
Boy: Aren't you going to eat lunch?
Me: No.
Boy: Do you have a dollar I can borrow?
Me: *thinking it's weird for a student to ask a teacher he doesn't know for money* Nope, sorry.
*Boy does obnoxious thing where he shakes his hand violently and his fingers hit his palm, making a clapping noise*
Silence.
*Boy does obnoxious clapping thing in my face. I lean away.*
Me: Ha ha *weak laugh. It begins to dawn on me that this kid doesn't realize I'm a teacher. I brush the thought off.*
Boy: Nice ring. *pointing at new ring Will got me for Christmas, then holds up his hands.* Ha ha! You've got smaller hands than me.
Me: Well, you're a boy.
Boy: Ha ha...
Silence.
Boy: So what are you doing this weekend?
Me: Nothing. Hanging out. *I consider mentioning husband and/or legal ramifications, then don't, because really?*
Boy: Do you go here?
Me: I'm a sub.
Boy: No, I mean, aren't you a student here?
Me: No... I'm a substitute teacher.
Boy: Right, right.  So, how many game systems have you got?
Me: None, but my husband has two.
Boy: *not deterred* Ha ha! Your husband. You're too young to be married.
Me: I'm about 25.
Boy: Ha ha! You got proof?
Me: What do you think this ring is for?
Boy: Bling. You got proof?
Me: Bling?*confused that a wedding ring isn't enough proof.  I mean, at BYU some are fake, but in a junior high?*  Of what? Being married or being 25?
Boy: Being 25. *smiling, like it's one large flirtation*
Me: *kind of amused* My driver's license. But it's not on me right now.
Boy: *offended, like I'm seriously his age and giving him the shaft* Ok, ok, I was just asking. Just trying to be friendly. *I give him a strange look.*

Boy goes off somewhere. Bell rings. I make my way back to the classroom and yell at the students who are blocking the doorway to move. I look to the left. It's Boy. Yes, he's in my eighth period class.

Me: Hi.
Boy: *dumbfounded* A-are you the sub?
Me: I told you I was a sub.
Boy: Oh.... yeah... uh.... Sorry about that whole...
Me: It's cool. *It finally, really gets through to me that yes, this kid thought I was also a kid. I heroically refrain from laughing*

The end.

Now, in his defense, I was sitting down and scooted all the way in to the table when we were in the lunch room, so he couldn't see my largely pregnant belly, and he wasn't the only kid that mistook me for another kid when I was sitting. But I'm still kind of surprised. Do I really look that young?

Maybe I'll really put it to the test by trying to sneak into a Teen Night (jr. high dance) next year. You know, after I have the baby.  If they still have those.

Edward on Ice

Has everyone been watching the Olympics this year?  Have you seen the male figure skaters?

Does anyone else think that they all look like Edward Cullen on ice?

Maybe it's the hair.  Maybe it's the costumes.  Maybe it's the dancing.

What do you think?

Valentine's Day Our Way

Who needs fancy restaurants and/or expensive gifts? This year, Will and I are doing Valentine's Day our way. I'm calling this one, "Involuntary Thriftiness 2010."

First, we're changing the date. That's right; our Valentine's Day is today, the 12th. Being LDS, we have chosen not to go out on Sunday. My parents (our babysitters) are going out on Monday. That left us today or tomorrow. We're going out today.

For a thoroughly romantic lunch, we drove through Wendy's. Will got Death on a Bun, alias "The Triple Baconator," and I tried the Beef and Blue, which was pretty good, but only if you like blue cheese a lot.

In about 15 minutes, we're leaving to catch a matinee of the new movie, "Valentine's Day," using some of the movie theater gift certificates we got for Christmas. Oh,yeah. If we're very lucky, one of my brother's friends will be working today and we'll get in for even less. Heck yes!

We didn't do fancy presents this year. Instead, we're sticking with food-based stuff. Yes, he did get me a box of chocolates (mmmm....) and I got him beef jerky. One thing I've learned about gift giving, it's about knowing that other person and getting them what they like, no matter what convention tells you. Will gets beef jerky on many holidays, and so far every time is like the first time, ha ha.
The point is, it doesn't matter to us that we can't do the big, conventional stuff. The point of the day is to show love and spend time with your significant other (or to walk around BYU campus with your number written on suckers and giving them to random, hopefully single men if you don't have one). To me, it's about being fun and focusing on each other, not going over the top.

So what's Valentine's Day about for you? Do you prefer the conventional things or not? What are your plans this year? Leave a comment and let me know!

Major SIDS Breakthrough

I found this article on SIDS (Sudden Infant Death Syndrome) that my mom friends or friends that will someday be moms might find informative. 

It's my personal hope that they can take this information and develop a test that can be performed on newborns soon after birth that let us (parents) know if our children are at a higher risk for SIDS, so we can take the appropriate precautions (beyond what we do already, of course).

10 Things I've Learned Since Becoming a Mom

This is prompt #5 on Mama Kat's writers' workshop this week.  Rockin.

1. Babies are not quite as breakable as I thought.  Don't worry about it.

2. Never, EVER say anything in front of your toddler that you don't want repeated at least 100 times.  For example, someone ran a red light in front of us today and Chaela was chanting, "What the heck, stupid?!" for about 10 minutes straight.  Like this: "What the HECK, stupid?!  What the heck, STUPID?!  What the HECK, stupid..." etc.  Except she said it more like, "Wa di HEH, oopid?!  Wa di heh, OOPID?!"

 3. When going out in public, I feel it's much more important that my child look good than me.  We get more compliments that way.

4. A two-year-old can eat their own weight in mac and cheese twice a day, every day.

5. When you're carrying your first baby while pregnant with your second, they squish your stomach between them.  It's uncomfortable.

6. Clean rooms can be demolished in ten seconds flat by one child.  Two children can do it in three seconds or less.

7. If you don't want your kid to touch it, put it up high.  If you're in someone's house and you don't want their kid to touch it, for goodness' sake, put it up high. 

8. People will whine at you when your kid gets into something that they refused to put up high.

9. "Oh, I'll NEVER buy my kid [whatever expensive/obnoxious thing]!"  Yes you will.  Because they like it.

10. It's ok if they hold their breath until they pass out.  Once they're unconscious, they'll breathe again.

Life in pictures (and captions)

This is what we do kind of late and night when daddy is playing video games on the real TV; turn the computer chair into a lounging spot and watch Robin Hood.

 Remember the day so bad it was funny I talked about on facebook? (Long story short, had to drink nasty sugar drink at the doctor’s for gestational diabetes test, had to get blood drawn, ripped pants and didn’t know it, walked around library for 20 mins with ripped pants and didn’t know it, realized pants were ripped AND keys were locked in the car at the library at the same time, laughed like a lunatic, had to go back into library to call police to come unlock car, waited outside leaning against car because pants were ripped, officer came and was nice, the end.) Anyway, here’s the hole I ripped in my pants. It’s a big one.

 Chaela likes to put in her own headbands now. If I come anywhere near her with one she yells, “NO MOMMY! I do it.” Except she screams “no mommy” and says “I do it” in her sweet voice... kind of scary.  Also, that on her head is a necklace.  Don't let her fool you.

This is one of the best times of the year… the time when all of the winter clothes go on clearance! Oh, yes. This lovely purple shress (my word for shirt/dress) was $2. That’s right. TWO DOLLARS! We are broke, but I could not pass this up.  By the way Chaela is working it in this picture, she obviously agrees.

…And I got her this. I feel more guilty about it (even though it was only $3), but felt compelled to buy it because we already have a shirt for Joci that says “little sister.” So of course you can see this was a necessity. More of a need than a want, really.  Yes.

Ok, so my life in pictures is really a bunch of pictures of Chaela (plus one ripped pair of pants).  But that's how it's supposed to be, right?  Except for the pants.

Halo: Reach

Alright all you Halo fans out there I thought I would update you with what is happening with Reach so far. They have released a few screenshots and told us a few things we can expect from this game.

So What's New?
The Game Engine
The entire game engine for Reach has been significantly overhauled which means there will be twice as many enemies on screen at one time,
higher resolution textures, increased poly counts, and radically improved animation systems which basically means better graphics. Also because they are dealing with a new system all the weapons, vehicles, characters, and objects had to be re-built from the ground up.

Armor Abilities
These are replacing the equipment that was in Halo 3. Armor ablities can be used again and again. Armor abilities have a recharge time and can be used over and over again until they are switched out for a different one. Only two of these have been revealed so far. Camo and Sprint.

Camo allows you to turn invisible when ever you want, but although you'll be invisible your radar will not work.

Sprint allows to run at significantly increased speeds for a few seconds.

There was a leak about this information a while back and it all seems to be true, so another one mentioned is a Hologram ability which allows you to create a hologram of yourself and the enemy will not know which is the real you. Whether the hologram is true or not I am not sure, that one was just a rumor. So we will see.

You can choose to do an assassination on enemies that don't see you.

Also the shield system from the first Halo is back since this is a prequel to the Halo series.

Weapons
The Assault rifle has a different look. looks more like a gun instead of a plastic toy. Click for High Res. goodness.



DMR (Designated Marksman Rifle) Medium-long range weapon, semi-automatic replaces the battle rifle. Reminds me of the FAL from Modern Warfare 2.


Needle Rifle (A mix between the Carbine and Needler)


Sniper Rifle (More powerful and from what I have heard it's bolt action.)


Vehicles
Love the detail in the Warthog. (There are several comparison pictures, comparing from Halo: CE through Halo: Reach. Reach is the last one in case anyone is confused.)Click for High Res goodness.

The Phantom now has a spotlight in night levels

All civilian vehicles are now drivable

The Falcon



The Spirit

Enemies
The Grunt

The Return of the Elite



Skirmishers (Cousins of the Jackals from previous Halo games)



The Characters
Noble Team
Noble 6 (The character you play as during campaign)

The rest of Noble team


The latest Trailer:
http://www.bungie.net/projects/reach/vidaudio.aspx?c=58&i=24083

And that's about it for now. There is still a ton about the game that is yet to be revealed, but there is a taste of what you can expect.